dirtylittledamsel: I Should’ve Saved That Gif When I Had The Chance Because Now I Can’t Find It: The Musical
I just met one of my dad’s friends and the first thing he said was “he’s a big lad, ain’t he?” and then he guessed I was a bassist somehow. I think he may be a wizard.
rampaigehalseyface: seababe: You really only understand how drunk you are when you’re peeing
So I’m at my caravan in Weymouth and my dad failed to tell me one of the chairs broke last weekend so when I sat on it to put my shoes on, I went through it and my hand landed in the dog’s food.
wishcave: *opens jacket* hey u wanna buy some oh jesus fuck it’s cold *closes jacket*
daddyfuckedme: wouldn’t it be cool if jellyfish floated around in air instead of water but they didn’t sting you instead they gave you little kisses and rubbed your forehead with their tentacles
katie-kapulet: whatthefinnick: My pre-calc teacher got kicked out of the movies once for yelling out diving scores during Titanic as people jumped off the boat.
algrenion: i think there should be AU’s and then there should be UA’s because Universe Alterations would be a good name for when your characters are in the exact same universe but you’re altering just a couple of plot points or a few character traits
rneerkat: rneerkat: how does real estate greet other real estate house it going
folie-a-tout: heyaeya: dameofspace: pandyssian: OH MY GOD APPARENTLY TAKING AN ARROW TO THE KNEE WAS AN OLD NORDIC SLANG FOR GETTING MARRIED I THOUGHT THAT ALL THOSE GUYS IN SKYRIM HAD LITERALLY BEEN SHOT IN THEIR KNEES WITH ARROWS BUT I GUESS NOT And at that moment, the foundation of that entire meme became something like this: THAT EXPLAINS WHY MEN GO DOWN ON ONE KNEE WHEN THEY...
slenclerman: slenclerman: i put the sex in dylsexia
rabioheab: grandpa tell us some of your old battle stories from your internet fights
dinhtheresa: I like being alone, but I hate the feeling of being lonely. When you’re alone, you have time for yourself. Your thoughts finally catch up to you. You set your mind on things and everything is just clearer. Nothing’s bothering you and everything just feels right for once. When you feel lonely, you feel as if no one’s there for you. It feels like no one understands you or is willing...
okellyjaneo: WHEN AMY'S BAKING COMPANY BAKERY... →
dronemasters: whatshouldwecallsocialmedia: OMG THIS IS THE BEST THING I’VE EVER SEEN. Facebook page here. Article here. omfg i cant believe these are real my fave (poetic) lines are: “you are weaker than my…
connuh: i need a job that pays at least 10,000 dollars an hour
poopflow: ah yes i have finally found it the g spot
puffymind: I never make the same mistake twice. I make it five or six times, just to be sure.
radsturbate: *reblogs post before i finish reading it* wait shit i don’t agree with that